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here's to the dog

Here’s to the dog who transformed from a scared, skinny, reserved mess into a brave, athletic, playful son. When we first met you at the pound, we took you into the yard to see how you’d interact with us. As Dad threw a ball, rather than fetching, you cowered, trying desperately to disappear into yourself.  Our hearts broke at the invisible story that brought you to such a sad place. For years, we didn’t think you had a voice at all. Maybe your box had been removed? Dad would give me such shit for trying to teach you to speak. Read More

532550_10151104590137813_148131134_n

here’s to the dog

Here’s to the dog who transformed from a scared, skinny, reserved mess into a brave, athletic, playful son. When we first met you at the pound, we took you into the yard to see how you’d interact with us. As Dad threw a ball, rather than fetching, you cowered, trying desperately to disappear into yourself.  Our hearts broke at the invisible story that brought you to such a sad place. For years, we didn’t think you had a voice at all. Maybe your box had been removed? Dad would give me such shit for trying to teach you to speak. Read More

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her death. her life.

Two years ago today, my Mom died. One week prior, I received a call from my sister saying she was taking her to the hospital for flu-like symptoms. In the ensuing avalanche of diagnoses that tumbled over our hearts, my Mom was swept away within 7 days. Less than 168 hours. My Mom died as she lived. Fierce. Brave. Strong. With gumption and energy and wit and gusto and dignity and humor and sharpness. Though it absolutely devastated me and my family, my Mom died with so much life…and for that I am grateful. Nobody had to take her in. Nobody had Read More

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roaring chickens: how I found my voice

One of my Mom’s many stories was about how she kicked the bucket…literally: I had a job stacking pails coming off a paint line. One of my bosses came in and told me to stack them one way, and so I did. Well, then, my other boss came in and told me to stack them a different way. So I did. Then the first boss came back in and asked: “Why are you stacking ’em this way and not the way I told you to?” Well, I’ll tell you what I did. I kicked those pails all over the place Read More

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her last month

August 5, 2013 Mom comes home from the doctor with positive news and a positive outlook. August 13, 2013 Mom arrives in Colorado for what would be her last trip to the place she loved dearly. Our time together entails adventures at the casino, the buffet, the dog park; drives through the mountains with affectionate hand-holding and back-rubbing; story-telling; chilly mornings in robes with cigarettes on the porch; visits from wildlife; long naps together in our bed. Upon reflection, Mom slept a lot. There were questions that now haunt me. “Mom, why are you holding your stomach?” “Mom, why can’t you Read More